The Future's There for Anyone to Change|
[Most Recent Entries]
Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in
Jeff Knight's LiveJournal:
[ << Previous 20 ]
[ << Previous 20 ]
|Tuesday, November 3rd, 2015|
|Saturday, July 5th, 2014|
|Saturday, March 31st, 2012|
|spells and jokes
Q. What does a Hufflepuff see when he looks into a box of cheerios?
A. Donut seeds.
Q. Why do Hufflepuffs always smile during lightning storms?
A. They think their picture is being taken.
Q. How do you get Hufflepuff s to laugh at a joke on Saturday?
A. Tell it to them on Tuesday.
Q. What did the Hufflepuff name its pet zebra?
Q. How did the Hufflepuff try to kill the fish?
A. By drowning.
Q. What did the Hufflepuff say when she saw a banana peel on the floor?
A. Oh no, I'm going to fall again!
Q: Why did the Hufflepuff nurse bring a red marker to work?
A: In case he had to draw blood!
Tarantallegra Spell Forces opponent to dance
Orchideous Spell Conjures a bunch of flowers
Creates a Patronus
Alohomora Charm Opens locked objects
Knocks out opponent
Creates light at wand tip
Why did Professor Snape stand in the middle of the road?
So no one could tell what side he was on.
How many trolls does it take to light up a wand?
How many Voldemorts does it take to light up a wand?
None. Why do you think he’s called the *Dark* Lord?
What does a death eater eat for breakfast? Cruci-O’s!
Where do you find Dumbledore’s army? In his sleevie!
What do you call a polite, well-dressed, and nice man at a Slytherin dinner?
It's wingardium leviosAAAAAAAAH!
How many Moaning Myrtles does it take to light a wand?
Answer: That's so insensitive! How can you ask me that when you know perfectly well I can't hold a wand because
|Thursday, November 3rd, 2011|
|Monday, October 24th, 2011|
|Jimmy Gownley is a total rock star.
The new Amelia Rules graphic novel is out and it is fantastic. Here's the wiki page for the high-context, low-detail explanation:http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amelia_Rules!
On tone and voice and just enough snark/edge whatever, plus a ton of heart and story and interesting characters, he is very near the center circle of my ideal in writing for upper elementary/middle school kids.
Well, excepting Jo, who is in her own parallel universe of greatness. :)
|Saturday, July 30th, 2011|
your favorite song: I got stuck right off the bat. Umm. Dude. OK. I’m gonna say “Blackbird.”
your least favorite song: so many to pick from. I’m gonna say “You Were Always on my Mind,” which slickly sells a theme I detest (“Don’t judge me by my actions, judge me by professed sentiment.”)
a song that makes you happy: “And Your Bird Can Sing (giggling version from Anythology),” Beatles
a song that makes you sad: “Idiot Wind,” Bob Dylan
a song that reminds you of someone: “Cassidy,” Grateful Dead
a song that reminds you of somewhere: “The Coast,” Courtyard Hounds
a song that reminds you of a certain event: “You Wreck Me Baby,” Tom Petty
a song that you know all the words to: many, many, many, but I’ll go with Mr. Zimmerman’s “Girl of the North Country.”
a song that you can dance to: anything by the Dead. Mystic taffy, anyone?
a song that makes you fall asleep: any long keyboardy overly-impressive complicated non-catchy thing by Yes.
a song from your favorite band: That would be the Beatles, but for variety I’ll go with REM: “Driver 8.”
a song from a band you hate: “The Question,” The Moody Blues. WOW, does this crap not hold up. Too much affected ungrounded “oh, it’s all so deeeeep.” Used to love this stuff….when I was 15.
a song that is a guilty pleasure: not that guilty about it, but I still love a lot of KISS songs.
a song that no one would expect you to love: Glee version of “Billionaire.” Awesomely stupid fun.
a song that describes you: “All my Life,” Todd Snider
a song that you used to love but now hate: can't think of one
a song that you hear often on the radio: “This is Why We Fight,” by the Decemberists
a song that you wish you heard on the radio: more Bevis Frond. “New River Head,” for starters.
a song from your favorite album: hmmm…I’ll say “Glass Onion,” from the White Album
a song that you listen to when you’re angry: “Positively 4th Street”
a song that you listen to when you’re happy: “Code Monkey,” Jonathan Coulton
a song that you listen to when you’re sad: “Last Minute Shakedown,” Son Volt
a song that you want to play at your wedding: “Here, There, and Everywhere,” by the Beatles :)
a song that you want to play at your funeral: Jackson Browne’s version of “Stay” strikes me as a really funny funeral song, and I always say that’s what I want, but seriously? Not sure. Maybe Joey Ramone’s “What a Wonderful World.”
a song that makes you laugh: “Life is Grand,” Camper Van Beethoven
a song that you can play on an instrument: I play and sing a bunch of songs (I play basic chord-versions), but for right now I’ll go with Chuck Berry’s “Nadine.”
a song that you wish you could play: anything with some virtuosity involved, but I’ll say Mr. Knopfler’s lead line from “Sultans of Swing.”
a song that makes you feel guilty: Patty Griffin’s “Be Careful.” Not just guilty, but guilty.
a song from your childhood: “School’s Out,” by Alice Cooper
your favorite song at this time last year: “Phoenix Burn,” Alpha Rev
|Thursday, June 16th, 2011|
|loud damn guitars with memphis horns.
I am right now stuck on a sound: loud damn guitars with memphis horns.
Danny Gatton's cover of "Apricot Brandy" is the gold standard, but it's not on the youtube.These exemplars will give you the idea.
What I want is MORE OF SAME! Suggestions?
|Wednesday, June 8th, 2011|
|a good old-fashioned LJ meme!
i got this from my friend Lisa, who is mingsmommy on LJ:
• Comment with "Come at me, bro"
• I'll respond by asking you five questions so I can get to know you better.
• Update your journal with the answers to the questions.
• Include this explanation in the post and offer to ask other people questions.
1. So, you know, you're one of my favorite people and as near perfect as human beings are likely to get. I am in awe of you, constantly with a WWJD (What would Jeff do?) mentality, but we all have qualities that don't serve us well...what's the one quality you have that you hope you don't pass on to your kids?
I’ll begin by saying that I deeply appreciate your high regard, and that it is very much mutual. It seems to me that most traits are good or bad largely as a matter of context and balance, you know, there’s a time to breathe in and a time to breathe out, turn, turn, all that true stuff. So, for example, it’s good to be disciplined about goals, but I can easily imagine someone wasting a life by being overly goal-oriented and missing the journey. I think my most typical failing, week-in, week-out, is with focus. When I’m present and focused, I bust a move. But I’m often distracted and unfocused and am spinning my wheels. That’s not a trait I’m hoping gets replicated. I’m better than I used to be about it. Still learning. Still screwing up. Still growing.
2. What's the hardest part of every day for you?
Hardest part of every day: day-in, day-out, it’s 5:30-6:30. I work till the last minute I have to leave to do kid pickups, and then I dash out from the office, fight traffic, and as we’re all getting home, it’s a race against the clock to get dinner on the table and still have some family time before Harrison’s bedtime. We’re all hungry and wrung out from the day. Then, dinner is served and everything changes. Aaaaaah.
3. What's the worst meal you ever made?
My worst cooking experiences were probably early attempts at frying. It took a lot of failures to get the operation down. Nowadays I can whip up some awesome onion rings, fried shrimp, et cetera, but the combination of how hot the oil should be and how to manage breading and/or batter was not easy for me. There were some soggy and unappealing meals along the way.
4. What's something you've done where you surprised yourself?
I’ll tell you a big way I surprised myself: I learned to juggle at age 30. I’m SOOOOOO word-oriented that more kinesthetic kinds of learning, where you’re *doing* something rather than understanding something in words, is kind of hard for me. I wasn’t quick to learn to ride a bike, or tie my shoes. I am a little klutzy. So the coordination to learn to juggle was a stretch, but it appealed to me, and I just decided to learn, however long it took, and I got very patient with myself and gave it a lot of time, and didn’t get hung up on how much progress I’d made…and I learned, and now I can juggle. I’m not awesome at it, but I can do it.
5. You've always, in the going on 30 years I've known you, been a loving, creative, fun and funny person, but under all that you've had this peaceful presence. Is that something you were born with or something you developed by the time you were 20?
I agree that I have a better-than-average ability to be centered and to access a deep peacefulness and ease of spirit, even in difficult circumstances. Not always, but often. Like everything else we are, it’s probably some combination of genetics, nurture, and individual free will/choice/agency. I most definitely find the moment between stimulus and response and choose centeredness plenty of times (and fail to choose it, too often). And I think it makes sense as an outgrowth of my experiences—I got a lot of good unconditional love as a baby/toddler/little kid, and then got some perspective-granting hard knocks in my adolescence, and maybe that combination is especially good at teaching resilience and ability to cope well with life’s dings and dents and worse? I think so. There’s an excellent writer/researcher named Joanathan Haidt who argues that this is a good recipe for happiness. Haidt’s work, plus a few other things I’ve read recently, also turn my thought in the direction of genes. I see a similar disposition “set point” of optimism with Cassidy and with Harrison, and--through a different lens--with Dylan. And I look a lot like my maternal grandmother’s brother’s looked, and they were all very accomplished and happy people. Bottom line, I think I got, and passed on, good genes on this issue and am grateful for it. I’m also pretty happy about the follicle situation, wherein I still have most of my hair, a few inches of extra forehead notwithstanding.
|Friday, April 8th, 2011|
|Across the state of Texas, to the land of dreams
I’m super-stuck on Randy Newman’s song “Dixie Flyer.”
Really great stuff. I urge you to go to grooveshark right now and listen to it like three or four times in a row. Don’t go to youtube, which has live versions but not the actual album track, because the album track is what you want. Really-really-really! Do it! You’ll be totally glad you did! Maybe you’ll want to buy it, too. Randy deserves your money.
It has so much going on; it is rewarding many (many) listenings on my part.
Musically, it’s both beautiful and interesting--values which aren't consistently coterminus over time--with Newman’s piano striking/haunting/pretty in the instrumental sections and then in the choruses moving to catchy-bluesy, and then--giving your ear a lot to notice--rolling along with a long fade featuring Mark Knopfler on both slide guitar and mandolin.
Lyrically, it’s even better than it is musically. There’re (literally) laugh-out-loud funny lines in there and great word-sounds and rhythms (it begins: “I was born right here, November ’43; Dad was a captain in the Army, Fightin’ the Germans in Sicily”). The reunion scene of the mother and daughter is a poignant moment that (literally) can bring a tear to my eye, and the word pictures are vivid (e.g. “dress as black as a crow in a coal mine”). The tone is knowing, sweet, and particularly smart about family.
Best of all: in a career of character songs, smart snark, thematic projects, et cetera, this is one of the few times Newman has written a really-about-him 1st-person song, and IN THAT SONG he has a very good section about people WISHING THEY COULD BE SOMEONE BESIDES WHO THEY ARE. The section is about his mother’s brothers, who want to act like the Southern locals “tryin’ to do like the gentiles do/Christ, they wanna be gentiles, too/who wouldn’t down there, wouldn’t you?/an American Christian, Goddamn!” and with a backdrop of WWII, that’s especially layered and rich. So I like it not just on its own immediate merits, which are considerable, but on the meta level of Randy stepping outside his wheelhouse for a minute, and while doing so, subtly critiquing his normal disguise-yourself style.
I also think it's very funny--in fact this is some of what recently sent me back to Randy Newman--that on Weeds the character of Andy uses "Randy Newman" as his incognito name. See? 'Cause Randy Newman writes in character? Hilarious.
I also reread a Randy Newman interview in Paul Zollo's very good book of songwriter interviews, and have been reading Randy Newman's old blog entries, which are awesome.
So, that's some of what's happening in my head today. Carry on. Peace and love, y'all.
|Friday, April 1st, 2011|
|"The Simple Truth," by Philip Levine
I bought a dollar and a half's worth of small red potatoes,
took them home, boiled them in their jackets
and ate them for dinner with a little butter and salt.
Then I walked through the dried fields
on the edge of town. In middle June the light
hung on in the dark furrows at my feet,
and in the mountain oaks overhead the birds
were gathering for the night, the jays and mockers
squawking back and forth, the finches still darting
into the dusty light. The woman who sold me
the potatoes was from Poland; she was someone
out of my childhood in a pink spangled sweater and sunglasses
praising the perfection of all her fruits and vegetables
at the road-side stand and urging me to taste
even the pale, raw sweet corn trucked all the way,
she swore, from New Jersey. "Eat, eat" she said,
"Even if you don't I'll say you did."
you know all your life. They are so simple and true
they must be said without elegance, meter and rhyme,
they must be laid on the table beside the salt shaker,
the glass of water, the absence of light gathering
in the shadows of picture frames, they must be
naked and alone, they must stand for themselves.
My friend Henri and I arrived at this together in 1965
before I went away, before he began to kill himself,
and the two of us to betray our love. Can you taste
what I'm saying? It is onions or potatoes, a pinch
of simple salt, the wealth of melting butter, it is obvious,
it stays in the back of your throat like a truth
you never uttered because the time was always wrong,
it stays there for the rest of your life, unspoken,
made of that dirt we call earth, the metal we call salt,
in a form we have no words for, and you live on it.
|Thursday, March 31st, 2011|
|Why two words? I'm stumped.
The verb "to intend"--and it's not alone in this regard--has two commonly-used and I think pretty much syonymous noun forms: "intent" and "intention."
If I were trying to explain to someone when or why we would use each of these, I couldn't do it in a way that's very satisfying. Can you?
When would you say "My intention was to do blah-blah-blah," versus "My intent was to do blah-blah-blah," and why?
|Tuesday, March 29th, 2011|
|"Report From A Far Place," by William Stafford
Making these word things to
step on across the world, I
could call them snowshoes.
They creak, sag, bend, but
hold, over the great deep cold,
and they turn up at the toes.
In war or city or camp
they could save your life;
you can muse them by the fire.
Be careful, though: they
burn, or don't burn, in their own
strange way, when you say them.
|Monday, March 28th, 2011|
I saw the recent news that LOL has made it into the OED. I’m interested to read the entry, because, as best I can tell, LOL no longer has any meaning. What was once used to signal an attempt at humor (in a text medium which inherently renders humorous tone difficult to convey) has morphed.
Initially, LOL was a way to signal “I don’t really mean it; I’m being funny,” as in EXAMPLE ONE:
Person A: I love the new Beck album!
Person B: Not me, I hate it. It sucks as much as your taste in music, LOL.
Rather than just agree, Person B makes a little game of faux-disagreement, then makes sure the reader understands intent by adding the LOL.
This was a modest-but-efficient bit of stage direction WAY back in the Jurassic era, when Bill Clinton was in the White House (LOL).
In example two, we see that LOL does still convey meaning, but in such an obvious way that it is unnecessary. You *might* have misunderstood and thought that Person B didn’t like the new Beck album. You’re unlikely to think that I really think the Clinton administration was contemporaneous to the Jurassic era.
But now LOL has gone from adding unnecessary tone to actually SUBTRACTING meaning from the utterance in which it appears, as in
Person A: Whatcha doing?
Person B: Not much. Making a sandwich, LOL.
In usage of this sort, the person really is eating a sandwich. There’s nothing funny about that fact. People eat sandwiches. And there’s no irony or nuance of tone to be understood.
[I grant that there may sometimes be such nuance in context-specific communications if, for instance, the two people have engaged in some kind of sandwich-based humor in an earlier conversation, and the LOL accesses that…but I doubt that’s what is generally going on].
Generally, I think Person B has gotten used to texting “LOL” and now does so reflexively, like a tic, for no good cause and to no good effect.
It seems to me like a very fast evolution, from helpful meaning-enhancer, to unnecessary meaning-clarifier, to distracting meaning-subtractor, LOL.
|Friday, March 25th, 2011|
The crop is getting thin, and the chickens too
Better get moving while the day is new.
I know you got something left in you.
It all goes around.
Some break free; some break down.
Some get lost; some get found.
And though I stand upon shaky ground,
I know it all goes around.
|Thursday, March 24th, 2011|
|Tuesday, March 22nd, 2011|
|"The Seven Of Pentacles," by Marge Piercy
Under a sky the color of pea soup
she is looking at her work growing away there
actively, thickly like grapevines or pole beans
as things grow in the real world, slowly enough.
If you tend them properly, if you mulch, if you water,
if you provide birds that eat insects a home and winter food,
if the sun shines and you pick off caterpillars,
if the praying mantis comes and the ladybugs and the bees,
then the plants flourish, but at their own internal clock.
Connections are made slowly, sometimes they grow underground.
You cannot tell always by looking what is happening.
More than half the tree is spread out in the soil under your feet.
Penetrate quietly as the earthworm that blows no trumpet.
Fight persistently as the creeper that brings down the tree.
Spread like the squash plant that overruns the garden.
Gnaw in the dark and use the sun to make sugar.
Weave real connections, create real nodes, build real houses.
Live a life you can endure: Make love that is loving.
Keep tangling and interweaving and taking more in,
a thicket and bramble wilderness to the outside but to us
interconnected with rabbit runs and burrows and lairs.
Live as if you liked yourself, and it may happen:
reach out, keep reaching out, keep bringing in.
This is how we are going to live for a long time: not always,
for every gardener knows that after the digging, after
after the long season of tending and growth, the harvest comes.
|Friday, March 18th, 2011|
|M. Scott Peck again....
"What makes life difficult is that the process of confronting and solving problems is a painful one. Problems, depending upon their nature, evoke in us frustration or grief or fear or anxiety or anguish or despair. These are uncomfortable feelings, often very uncomfortable, often as painful as any kind of physical pain, sometimes equaling the very worst kind of physical pain. Indeed, it is because of the pain that events or conflicts engender that we call them problems. And since life poses an endless series of problems, life is always difficult and is full of pain as well as joy.
Yet it is in this whole process of meeting and solving problems that life has its meaning."
|Thursday, March 17th, 2011|
|Wednesday, March 16th, 2011|
|Proposition: The market views nuclear power as so risky
that it will neither capitalize nor insure nuclear reactors. Therefore, if nukes are to be built, it falls to the taxpayer to assume that risk.
Conservative republicans typically argue that (a) market forces ought to decide what does and doesn’t get done, (b) the government should be shrunk, not least because (c) government makes a mess out of whatever it touches. Yet most conservative republicans are very much in favor of directing taxpayer dollars toward nuclear power.
If you believe the proposition to be false, why do you think it is false?
OTOH, if you agree with me that the proposition is true, what sense do you make out of the contradiction?
My inner cynic kind of thinks that the answer is to do with money, that the nuke industry has bought its influence. But let’s extend the benefit of the doubt long enough to do a thought experiment: If we could give truth serum to, oh, let’s make it Jim DeMint (small government Tea Party Senator, strongly pro-nuke), and ask him to reconcile the contradiction, what would he say?